I Did Nothing on the 9th of July 2011

To be honest, when I told a friend that I should be going for the rally on the 28th Jun 2011, I lied. I was really thinking of an excuse to skip it. But how could I tell him that when I have always been challenging people to make a difference in our country? What good enough excuse do I have to tell him that I am not going?

As 9th July drew closer, I really couldn't find a real good reason. I mean, I can't tell him (and everyone else) that I am afraid of getting caught, can I? And I'm sure I can't tell him that I am afraid that I will lose my job because I hold a criminal record, right? So instead of telling him how afraid I was (and discouraging him in the process), I gave him all the reasons that he must go. I even almost scolded those who told me that they are not going!

As things got more heated up, I slowly but surely gained momentum in being determined to go. As the bans, arrests and 'illegalisation' of yellow t-shirts grew, I grew even more indignant and angry at the government. Not only are they corrupted, they are removing the very essence of our freedom - our freedom of speech, our freedom to protest, our freedom of fashion and dressing, and our freedom of going about in my own country. How much more do they want to take away?! The more they tried to intimidate me, the more I believe that God has the upperhand. And march I must.

Was I scared? Hell, yes! I fasted and prayed that God would protect me and Edward from harm. I prayed that God will give us the wisdom to act in the right manner (eg. run when we had to!). I prayed that God will send His angels to shield and cover us, so that the police cannot see us even if we stood in front of them. I prayed that God will not let harm and evil lay even a finger on us. I prayed against fear that is not from God. And I prayed for the safety of everyone who would be there.

On 9th July 2011, I woke up and I felt peace and some excitement. Edward and I went to grab our lunch before we headed off to the LRT station. We took the train and the atmosphere was different. It was as though we are going for battle. A battle that I know would be victorious. We met another two friends on the train. We talked about what we'd tell the police if they asked us what we are doing in KL on a day that they told us to stay at home.

As the LRT passed the old Stesen Keretapi, I could see Malaysians walking to KL together in one direction. My excitement grew. The LRT did not stop at Pasar Seni nor at Masjid Jamek, so we got out at Dang Wangi. When we got out, I felt like I was in a movie scene, where the whole city is deserted and waiting in anticipation for a hero to come and save the day. We walked toward Stadium Merdeka.

We knew we were near when we could smell tear gas and hear the chopper flying above us. We saw FRU and police trucks parked right in front of Maybank and we walked up towards Maybank, hoping to get to the stadium. We saw that the police had sprayed water canons as the road was wet. I grew slightly anxious, where was everyone?! How far more before we reach Stadium Merdeka? We bumped into some familiar faces and saw that their eyes were red and their hair wet. And they are still smiling at us.

Suddenly, everyone started running at our direction, shouting 'Police!' and we panicked and started to run. We ran towards a ledge and everyone seemed to stop in their tracks. Some jumped. Edward said he'll jump first and catch me from below. We looked over the ledge and realised that it was at least 1-storey high. I knew that we could not jump.

Out of no where, the fear and panic just left me. As the police came charging towards the ledge where we were, we turned around and we walked. Yes, we calmly, and slowly walked away from the ledge and away from the police. Did the police see us? Unless they are blind, definitely. Did they try to arrest us? No. Why? Because God would not let them lay a finger on us.

We saw people getting handcuffed. And we even saw a guy running away with his hand cuffed! We walked away from Maybank towards Jalan Pudu. And then we met them. MALAYSIANS by the thousands walking towards the Staidum Merdeka, hand in hand shouting Hidup, Hidup, Hidup Rakyat! Hancur, Hancur, KEZALIMAN! The street was filled with people, and there was no distinction of colour, background and status. My eyes welled up with tears. I felt an overwhelming sense of unity, love, honour and pride.

While I was taking all of that in, without warning, the police fired tear gas into the crowd, right next to where Edward and I were standing. Some of them stood firm, while others ran. The police ran at those who stood firm and started to beat them up. We seeked refuge in a Rumah Tumpangan nearby with many others. Everyone was coughing their lungs out, our eyes, nose, lips burning from the tear gas. A man was offering everyone salt and everyone shared their water. We comforted each other, affirming that it will be okay.

The air started to get slightly better, and we heard the 'bangs' again. They shot another round of teargas, and my whole face started to sting again. We offered each other help and started making friends with each other while we waited the sting out. This was no party. But we are friends because we value and believe in the same cause. We slowly crept downstairs after awhile. The police has cleared the area.

We walked the streets again. I was starting to get apprehensive. The tear gas sucked. And I wasn't sure if I wanted to be shot at again. But I can't leave just yet. Not when everyone is fighting on. So we headed towards Petaling Street. I knew that the tear gas couldn't have sent us home. I knew that there was more. And sure enough, I saw them again.

MALAYSIANS in all colours, calling out "Hidup, Hidup, Hidup Rakyat! Hancur, Hancur, KEZALIMAN! Bangkit, Bangkit, Bangkit Rakyat!" And we joined in this time, shouting together, excited, exhilarated, and with honour. And we walked together, telling the world that we are standing against corruption, injustice, disunity, and oppression. Thank you, dear Malaysians, for being there that day.

I know that the BERSIH rally has stirred up some sort of emotion in each Malaysian. Whether a sense of victory, or a sense of displeasure, or even a sense of 'it didn't matter to me'. But we made history that day, whether or not you and the BN government agree. We stood united, despite the arrests, the water canons, the tear gas, the fear, the threats, the mockery, and the desperate measures to stop us. We cannot be stopped. When what we stand for is Godly and right, who can stand against us?!

9th July 2011 is just the beginning of our fight to a better Malaysia. I couldn't stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks as I watched the videos of people getting beaten up for doing the right thing - asking for clean and fair elections. I can't help but cry out in pain as I watch evil oppress the poor and the weak. I can't help but feel angry and disgusted at Najib and the IGP for telling lies about what has really happened that day. God has put this fight in my heart, and I pray that He will stir you up as well. Malaysia is our home.

I am writing this post to tell you that I did nothing. But WE did something. Quite a magnificent something.

New Plates!

Dear God,

Thank YOU. We collected the keys and we love it! Now the only 'difficult' part is paying for it. Father grant us grace, and provide for us. May we never serve money and be a slave to it but continue to seek first Your righteousness, and all these will be added to us.

We are so grateful that You made this possible. I am soooOoooooOOOOOooo excited about building our new home. Even the thought of new plates excite me. It's Yours - use it to glorify You. Let us bless others with our home and hospitality, let us be generous just as you have been so generous with us.

Thank You Jesus. :)

Was it what they REALLY wanted?

On 14th April 2011, I flew into Sibu, Sarawak, praying that God will bring about good change to the entire state of Sarawak and raise up good leaders who would truly bring the people out of their poverty.

On 16th April 2011, the people themselves have decided that they believe in BN, or at least the majority did. As a polling and counting agent in the Bawang Assan area, there were very minimal cheating going on in the polling and counting room, which meant one thing - the people voted FOR BN. And when it is their choice, there really isn't much more I can say.

It is sad, because the people who walked into that room to vote were Ibans and they are not well off. Some are without clean water, some doesn't have electricity, the roads are not roads, etc.etc. I wondered why they still put the X next to the 'dacing', and my only logical answer is that they don't know better. So my question is 'Is BN the government that they REALLY want?'.

Some thoughts that came out from this trip is that we don't have to go to africa, or cambodia or vietnam to do missions. Go into the longhouses and do your ministry there. There are people there who needs you, and needs to be told that they have been robbed of the wealth that they have in their own home and land. They need to do something and be freed from being taken advantage of. Who's going to speak for them? Who's going to speak to them?

More Optimism and Less Pessimism

My thoughts are all over the place. But in times of uncertainty, everyone needs a little pick me up. And some good encouraging words.

Don't flatter me, but don't flatten me either. I go well with lots of positive assurance and less negativity.

I really don't know what will happen tomorrow. How can I unless I am God? But I guess I will live each day giving thanks to God for what I have.

HOT!

Such a hot day today. On a hot day like this, reading His word calms me, soothes me and gives me peace. Peace to know that I have been redeemed and that God knows me by name. And that's right, I have nothing to be afraid of.

"But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
3 For I am the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush[a] and Seba in your stead.
4 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give people in exchange for you,
nations in exchange for your life.
5 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will bring your children from the east
and gather you from the west.
6 I will say to the north, ‘Give them up!’
and to the south, ‘Do not hold them back.’
Bring my sons from afar
and my daughters from the ends of the earth—
7 everyone who is called by my name,
whom I created for my glory,
whom I formed and made.
8 Lead out those who have eyes but are blind,
who have ears but are deaf.
9 All the nations gather together
and the peoples assemble.
Which of their gods foretold this
and proclaimed to us the former things?
Let them bring in their witnesses to prove they were right,
so that others may hear and say, “It is true.”
10 “You are my witnesses,” declares the LORD,
“and my servant whom I have chosen,
so that you may know and believe me
and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
nor will there be one after me.
11 I, even I, am the LORD,
and apart from me there is no savior.
12 I have revealed and saved and proclaimed—
I, and not some foreign god among you.
You are my witnesses,” declares the LORD, “that I am God.
13 Yes, and from ancient days I am he.
No one can deliver out of my hand.
When I act, who can reverse it?”
Isaiah 43:1-13

Talent

"If you are faithful with little, you will be faithful with much."

I think God is telling me something. I have been pretty restless for the past few weeks or month, thinking that there must be something more that I can do to contribute to God's kingdom.

I needn't have to look very far to find a 'TALENT'. Anything can be a talent. Ability to speak is a talent in itself. Ability to read and write is a talent. The world has cheated us to think that a talent has to be something so great that no other man can do. Undeniably there are people who has that kind of talent. They possess some skill or ability so great that no other man has.

But that's them. Me, I MUST be faithful with what I have.

Inside my head

1) What can you make out of work?
2) Some people are so selfish.
3) Can I live with the guilt? will God be angry and put it into my account?
4) Why are shell's processes so terribly inefficient?
5) Do you want the business or not?!
6) I can't decide who to support: Kim Clijsters or Li Na
7) What time should I go to the salon on Saturday?
8) What time can I go home today?
9) Do you think it is my responsibility to be doing those deals while my pricing manager is away? He didn't even brief me about anything but merely copied me in the emails. And now everyone is coming to me? What der?
10) Well in ref to point (9), if I had time to spare, I'd gladly help, but I'm stuffed with month end, and many other things to do too. WWJD?
11) Hungry.
12) Everything is urgent and due yesterday.